It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas

I've started wrapping my gifts already! Although I still don't have one for Mom, Jom, Sarah and Julian.

I really enjoy wrapping stuff. I love doing the plastic covers of my books, notebooks, giveaways and yes, gifts! Despite loving wrapping gifts, I still scrimp on the wrapper itself. I just buy whatever 'okay' wrapper there is. Of course, there comes a point when you're not satisfied with just wrapping something properly. I've moved to wrapping stuff beautifully!

This year, I vowed to not scrimp on wrappers. I even bought ribbons to match them. LOVE IT SO MUCH! And I love tying ribbons too! Not everyone appreciates little details such as how nicely ribbons are wrapped but for the sake of satisfying my wrapping-OC-ness (yes, exclusive to wrapping because I don't consider myself OC), I still spend so much time typing and retying the ribbon until I manage that only the shiny side of the ribbon appears and that the tails end up right where they're supposed to be.

Finally found use for the rubber stamps I bought on impulse at ArtFriend in Singapore.

It is sad sometimes that people just slash the ribbon off the gift as soon as they receive it. HAHA I'm not holding any grudges though. The ribbons are meant to be removed and the wrappers, to be torn. I guess I just want to say that thoughts are placed not only in the choice of gift but also in the way the gift is presented.

This year it's gold-chocolate-forest green. I really really love this color combination.

Hmmm, maybe I should have themes every year. haha

From now on, I'm wrapping my gifts in the best wrappers I can find. I'm not gonna settle for jologs wrappers because it's not everyday we can give gifts. Might as well do a 'total package'.

Now that I think about it, I guess it's one reason why I enjoy buying gifts* even if it's sooo stressful to find the perfect ones (yes, I had to order glow-in-the-dark drumsticks from the States for my brother Joop). Because I have something to wrap. :)

*I'm the only one in the family who gives gifts. My dad has shifted to giving us cash. My brothers are the most barat ever. My mom takes care of us all year round. She doesn't need to give us gifts.

I just finished watching a video of my nephew Julian. He was laughing and giggling and clapping. I find myself crying after.

I miss Julian so much. He rarely spends time with me- not that he has to. He's visited only once in each of dad's last two visits here in Manila.

I feel so much injustice not being able to spend time with him. And I say this without (hopefully) sounding like his mother. I dunno. I guess kids just have this effect on you. You become kinder, and more hopeful of the future. And you become 'meaner' to bad people because it is sort of your contribution in making the world a better place for the kids.

Okay, I'm stopping now. I just had to write this down.

Lotto

Two days ago, I played the lotto. It was my first time. I even had to ask the lady beside me how I should mark the numbers. The reason I played was because the jackpot was, at that time, 354 million pesos. Well, by now you might have already heard no one won in last night's draw. I didn't even get a single number right! HAHAHA So much for beginner's luck. The jackpot already reached 380+ M today but I'm not getting another ticket. Maybe I'll have a better chance in jueteng. (Which I haven't tried yet and I have no idea how to play.)

If I won that 354 M, I wonder how I'll spend it in my lifetime. Like they say 'madaling ipangako ang bagay na wala ka'. But I'm listing it anyway.

Definitely charity is there. Sounds like a cliche noh? Everybody claims they'll do charity work if they get rich. My kind of charity is this- build the children's library my mom has always wanted to have and donate a building in UP- maybe a Student Center. An integrated student tambayan for all or most organizations in the campus much like CBA's 4th floor but a whole building. It'll have conference rooms, a cafeteria, study halls- the works! And then upgrade our labs and equipment to support more research. I'm kind of vain so maybe I'll have some rooms under names I specifically picked. No one cares about room names anyway- just me. HAHA

I also want a foundation that's self sustaining. The worse part of doing charity work is begging for money. Definitely with that much money from the lotto, whatever foundation can 'live on interest' from the money in the bank. Not quite sure if the foundation is for kids, indigenous people, oldies, animals, whatnot.

Then maybe I'll buy Villa Garcia from my dad's auntie. Villa Garcia is the ancestral house where my dad grew up. Now it's old, torn, and not even safe to live in. I've never been inside. They don't allow us for fear that the house might collapse. Anyway, I'd like to buy it and restore the house. Maybe build a new house if the structure isn't restorable but in the same look as it had before.

I'll keep enough money to also 'live on interest'. Maybe I'll save some to support future researches of my younger brother Joop who wants to be a marine biologist. Definitely I'd give Jom some too. I'll give my mom a retirement fund. She's never worked since she married dad but she's done so much for our family. It's hard to run a household noh! So she deserves this. Of course Dad, so he can take mom to dates wherever. Even in Paris.

Whatever's left with the 354 million after all these, maybe I'll give it to another private institution. I'm tired to dealing with the government supported institutions. They are inefficient and uninspiring so I'd much rather give the money to the private sector.

Oh well. All these are written on sand. I don't have 354 million anyway. But if one day I manage to have that much money, I swear I'll work on this list one by one. *now playing Billionaire HAHAHA*

Brother

It's my kuya's birthday! I love him more than he thinks I do. I just never tell him because we didn't grow up like that. We grew up having wrestling matches everyday. In some days I win, in some days he does. But I guess we've consumed all our fight cards when we were kids that we ran out of fight cards for latter use. (I clearly remember we wrestled on the bed because 'nagkapikunan', I had this silver ring with a silver playboy-ish bunny design and during the fight, it hit his forehead. He was so mad at me coz it bled a bit. Then we stopped the wrestling match. Believe me it was a daily thing for us to fight.)

Like I tweeted a few days ago, "You can never abandon your brother. Your heart won't let you."

When my brother needs something from me, I scramble to help him in the best way I can think of. Because to me, it's a chance to let him feel I love him. After all, action speaks louder than words.

Sometimes I cry at the thought of things that might have been if he stayed with me here at home back in college. Would we be closer? Could we have gone to spur of the moment roadtrips to the beach when we don't have classes? Would we have watched UAAP matches together? After graduation, would we have gone to the States for a vacation as a graduation gift?

I have two vivid memories of time well spent with my brother. One was over dinner back in second sem of my sophomore year- I think we had yellow cab chicken and pizza. We talked all night. Until 10 pm if I remember it right. He told me about his 'then' love life, I told him about my (imaginary) love life. HAHAHA It was one of those 'I don't know why we're telling each other these things but I like it anyway' moments. The second one, he got so hungry at midnight and he asked me if I wanted to have McDo delivered. I declined because I didn't have money and he agreed to pay for whatever I want to order. So I got sundae and fries. He made the call. Our eyes have rolled and gone white and the food never arrived. I went to sleep. He stayed up. In the morning I asked 'dumating yung pagkain?' HINDI. hahahaha The only time he offered to pay for a food delivery and it never arrived. Hilarious! I wonder if he remembers that time.

Maybe one day, one way my family will find my blog and read each and every entry here. I guess that's the only way my siblings will know that I've declared my love for them countless of times in this vast cyberspace.

I tell my friends I love them but with sibs...I guess they just know.

Anyway, Happy birthday Jom! I love you.

Ohana

My Lola Ampy is sick. She's my Dad's stepmom but she's the lola I grew to know because my Lola Adeliza passed away when Dad was just a kid.

Lat week, Lola Ampy had a stroke that affected her left brain. Now, she couldn't not recognize anyone in the family. At one point my Tita Mel said she was talking to our dead relatives and was telling them she still has to do something. It's freaky. But the fact that she isn't willing to go gives us hope. She is in San Diego which is a good thing because they have better healthcare programs in the States. They can take better care of there there.

I worry for Lolo. It's his birthday on the 12th. It's definitely not the best birthday but I still wish they celebrate it.

We're planning this grand reunion of the Garcias in June. With lola falling ill, I'm not quite sure if it's pushing through. I haven't tried asking because it's really not the best time to discuss the reunion. But if it doesn't push through, maybe I'll arrange a visit to the States. That's if I can convince my dad to let me off from work for at least six weeks. (Sayang naman if I go for a quick visit lang hahaha) Then maybe I'll visit my relatives in Florida too (Mom's side).

Right now I just pray that Lola gets well. I'm not that close to her unlike my cousin Dawn who practically grew up with Lola as her mom. My siblings and I are grew up independent from our cousins so we tend to stick together unlike my cousins who are super close- almost like siblings. She's still my lola. Lolo loves her.