Lights, Camera, Action!

When I want to know something, I make sure I don't stop until I am satisfied with the answers. Like when I ask who you're rooting for between Maribel and Rubi, I don't shut up when you tell me who. I ask why, and then assuming I'm still not satisfied, I throw in a question or two about why I disagree. This is not to start an argument of course. It's because I want to understand.

Days ago I saw a quote that reads "If you do not go after what you want, you'll never have it."

I've always wondered why we keep looking at things that can hurt us? Is it just because we'd rather take the pain than drown in the pool of curiosity? Or we think it's painful now so a little more won't make a change? Or do we think getting all the pain now spares us from future ones a.k.a. isang bagsakan nalang?

Days ago I had dreams. Really nice dreams that I actually tried to sleep more hoping to see the sequel. So I actually entertained of going after the dream. I thought of flying to Sydney, stroll in the park, hoping to bump into that dream.

But when I began doing my 'research' I found out that my dream does not exist anymore. That someone else is living it. And I just have to settle with the fact that it's something I cannot control. You're probably planning to tell me to still go for it and prove that I can do a better job. Hold it. This is not some big shot job I can just steal from anyone. You see, it's not easy to control someone's heart. You can't control people and manipulate things like the director does in movies.

I have a feeling I've had too much movies while growing up. Feeling ko kaya kong i-control yung mga bagay-bagay. Feeling ko pag ginawa ko yung ginawa nung bida, yung katambal ko ay magrereact rin parehas nung nasa pelikula. So even as an adult, there's that little child in me thinking I can achieve things by plotting scenes.

I've done them before- not just with my crushes ok? (DON'T JUDGE!) Even when I pair up my friends, or when I plan surprises for other people. It's all about timing. Everything I plotted for my friends- birthdays, victories, events- they all worked perfectly. But when it comes to my life- it just doesn't seem to go my way. We become happy and then we drift apart. I've never had a 'connection' that lasted more than a sem. Some reasons include not being classmates anymore, I graduated already, etc. Maybe someone should do the plotting for me too noh?

If there's one thing I appreciate about watching so much movies when I was a kid is that like in movies, I am an actress and God is my director.

And yes, just like in the movies, when you trust the director and the time is right, surely you'll get your happy ending.

STAY IN LOVE WITH LOVE!♥

p.s.

I think I now know why I like Hector. Aside from the fact that I like Diether ever since I can remember, the character of Hector reminds me of my dream. Their way of dressing up, the way they treat ladies- super Hector.